Monday, January 28, 2008

Be carefull what you wish for (contains swear words)

Remember back when I had just started this blog and I was complaining about the endless racket from the house next door? they were converting a single villa into a six flat apartment block, and the noise shook the floors of our house from six am until nine pm.

Our relationship with the construction guys had it's ups and downs, with things finally coming to a head one friday morning when they started banging at six. Stone went over and explaned that if they did that again on a friday morning he would grab a gun and shoot each guy one by one. They called the supervisor and he showed up and Stone told him that he would shoot him too. The supervisor called the Omani owner who showed up and said that you cant' threaten to shoot people, to which Stone reported that you can't shake the fucking floors with jackhammering at Six O clock on a friday morning either, and if he preferred we could involve the ROP and the municipality.

The Omani owner looked over at the Lazy Pakistani "supervisor" Who spent most mornings supervising the inside of his eyelids from the comfort of his Air conditioned Prado, and whacked him. After that Friday mornings were quieter,and the construction guys would try and find quiet work to do until seven. We would give them fresh fruit from our trees, and they would help carry grceries for me from the store across the street.

I only had harsh words with them them one other time, which was when they were applying a layer of concrete to the outside of thier building, and also, inadvertantly, to my house, the windows, and to the floor of my patio, and to our patio furniture, and to our freshly washed laundry hanging in our yard.

I climbed the scaffolding, whipped the trowell out of one guy's hand, and said something like "Godfuckingdamnit you morons, if you're going to spray everything in the yard with concrete then get down here and help me move the laundry line! " We looked after each other during the Cyclone, and Stone and I made sure they got fed since thier Company aparrently forgot about them for two weeks following the storm. They would sometimes come over and play with the baby in the evenings.

Still, the endless banging and the constant spatter of paint and concrete all over our house and yard, and the random but occasional objects (brick, paint can, 2X4) falling from the sky into us got old fast. So when they finally finished thier work and went away it was like a dream come true.

Or so I thought.

Each of the six flats has been leased to famalies with kids between the ages of 4 and 10. They love Football, and play directly below my bedroom window from 10:00-14:00 and from 16:00-22:00 every day. All ten of them, screaming and chasing one ball around, all day long.

Sadly, these kids really really, really, suck at Football. They suck so badly that I am considering paying for all of them to attend some sort of football coaching camp for the football-challenged. How do I know they suck? Because four times today, three times yesterday and at least twice a day, every day for the last month they have managed to kick the soccer ball into our yard. So, four times today, three times yesterday, and at least twice a day, every day for the last month they have rung the bell, interrupting me, and often waking the baby.

I have disconnected the bell now, and taken the soccer ball away. They can have it back tomorrow.

I have a new wish now, I wish there were a safe park for the kids in my neighbourhood to play in. All we have are empty lots strewn with trash and construction debris. Which is a little pathetic when you think about how much money the municipality spends landscaping round abouts and highway verges.

More tomorrow, when I will be lighting candles instead of cursing the darlness.


L_Oman said...

Funny post.

I wouldn't give those little kids their ball back. I'm just mean like that. Ok, I'd make 'em wait a day or two longer...

Building a house sucks here. You buy brand new stuff, they trash it the day after they fix it (tiles / mosaic / gypsum false ceiling) then every joe, dick, harry and sue come in to the house for a 'look-see' before it's done and leave their footprints all over the fricking place. In the meantime, the little soccer playing neighborhood kids come in, stick their fingers into a bucket of bitumen and draw stars all over your new door frame.

Love it.

Hope you get your hub back soon. Sounds like a keeper for sure!

Jawahir Jewels said...

salam about the construction we had the same problemwhen our neighbour was haveing his house redone omg it was a mess and not only that they damaged som much of our property and it was rediculous but one day my mom got very angry with the owner of the house and bless her she is a small cute petite woman told him off :)and then later during the day i met with him (not knowing what had happened) i told him the workmanship of the repairs to our house was very bad and he said sorry and that he spoke with my mom... anyway we have a white painted house he painted it peach on the side of the damage just an example .... anyway kids deserve a ball and we all did that as for teaching them ball why dont u do that for a bit ;)

Per Your Request said...

I remember those days! If you dont answer the door, they will soon begin to leap over the walls and take over your yard. In that case you might need a taser. I know I know, it sound harsh, but you need to protect your home.

Kay said...

The kids on my street actually hit my car and left a dent : ( No one will will confess to which SOB it was that kicked the ball but if I ever find out who it was I'm keying his parents car.

Suburban said...

Thanks for the comments guy and girls!

L_0man- Your experiences are hilarious, especially the Bitumen stars. Budding grafitti artists in your neighbourhood? Stone is fabulous, and as I type he is beside me drinking beer and enjoying his first day off in three weeks.

JJ- I would teach them but I can't play football to save my life. Honestly.

PYR_ You kill me! I have thought about rigging the gate with Ice water, or electrifying the door bell. Or both. Heh heh heh. I also thought I might carve fourty little jack'o'lanterns and skewer them on the spikes around the compound wall. I figure that would mess with thier heads. Stone has suggested boiling oil.

Kay, You must live in my neighbourhood, the kids here are like small satanic apperations. THe little fuckers stole the logo off of Stone's car last year, and scratched the hell out of the sides trying the steal the side logos. Stone was Livid.

A quick update: a few hours later they kicked a spare soccer ball into the yard and rang the bell to retrive it. Not ten minutes later they had kicked the thing back over to our side of the compound, and were at the door again.

Stone crept up to the gate, Whipped it open, and jumped out like a menacing psycho Killer and Yelled "WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING???" and the little cretins almost pissed themselves. THey literally broke the sound barrier running back to thier house, screaming the whole way.

We haven't been bothered since. Way to Go Stone.

Undercover Dragon said...

You're absolutely right about the empty lots. Muscat Municipality should get its shit together. It would cost very little to turn these multitude lots into little simple parks for the kids. They just have no-where to go.

Perhaps the next time His Majesty is feeling flush, he could donate something for this initiative. Kids need somewhere to play.

As for the ones bothering you, threats of violence will only work for a while... then they'll key your car. Try giving them cookies, and milk,... with poison in it. (joke, joke)

Seriously, somewhere better to play that is far from you is the only real answer. Good luck!