Sunday, March 16, 2008

So, I got a life.

Sorry for the lack of updates lately, but I've started a new project that takes up a lot of my time, so blogging has fallen to the wayside. I'm sorry I haven't had a chance to reply to the comments, or to comment on other blogs lately. I'm hoping that eventually my time management skills will improve to the point where I can have a life and a blog simultaneously. Stay tuned.

Briefly, a couple of things I wanted to share with you guys. Cool stuff first, then the bitching.

Did I mention That Stone and I spent the weekend in Dubai recently with my cousin and her husband? Oh good. Did I mention how we got there and back? No?

We took thier jet. Thier private jet.

It was awesome, and we managed to avoid singing the Fergie Glamourous song more than twice on board. Since I know you all want to live vicariously through me, I'll share a few of the highlights.

  • Your own check in desk at the airport.
  • You can change your flight schedule. Want to spend another couple of hours shopping? Call the pilots and tell them you want to take off later.
  • You can sit in the cockpit for takeoff and landing, and you can listen to the air traffic control.
  • You get your own terminal at Dubai. We were through customs and immigration in less than five minutes.
  • You can drink as much champaigne as you want, just wander back to the galley and help yourself.
  • But the very, very, very, best part is this: In Seeb, you get your own bus to the plane. You know, like one of those giant busses with lots of floor space and poles for everybody to hang on to. What do you do given an entire airport bus to yourself? If you are my immensely talented cousin, you will perform an impromptu pole dance so elaborate and seemingly defying the laws of gravity that you will spend the rest of the trip denying that you were once a professional stripper. Stone has suggested we buy a airport bus for personal use. Heh, Heh, Heh...

In addition to being a really talented pole dancer, my cousin taught us a great game to play with fortune cookies. Read your fortune cookie aloud to the table, but at the end, add the words "in Bed". It's extra funny if it's a family dinner, because there is nothing like hearing your grandmother say "You should be able to make money and hold on to it... In Bed"

A few fortune cookie sayings that would be really funny this way spring quickly to mind:

  • Your talents will be recognized and suitably rewarded.
  • Little and often makes much.
  • A thrilling time is in your immediate future
  • Decide what you want and go for it
  • The time is right to make new friends

Now, the bitching.

Can anyone explain why we have to close the main road every freaking time some head of state Visits the country? I bitched about this issue in the past too. Go read it, it's funny.

That last post about religous views was inspired by a coffee I had recently with a friend. I was really hoping to have a nice cup of coffee with a cool chick who is sort of the same as me and sort of different than me. I really like smart, funny people, and she is both.

The conversation turned ( She steered it) to how an individual practices thier faith. I tried so hard to defend my own personal actions, without insulting or demeaning hers, that I should win some sort of purple heart for bravery in the face of her Self Rightous, Holier than Thou, My Cloud will be Higher than Yours in the Afterlife, and why don't you dressmoreconservatively and coveryourhair attitude.

As if she, personally, will be guarding the gates to paradise on the big day. As if.

On the subject of religion, sort of... I am like the last person you will ever meet who would say that something generally under my own control is the will of god, but I am telling you now. It is the Will Of God that my air conditioning does not work.

FOUR CONSECUTIVE CARS have had non-working A/C or barely Working A/C. Now we have the Jeep, we bought it because the A/C blew so cold that the windscreen would ice up. We had the thing one week and the A/C gave out. We've replaced the A/C clutch twice, and now the computer has gone so even if the Compressor or Clutch worked, we couldn't turn it on. Bizarre.

And now the baby is awake, so I'm going to try and be a good mother for the next few hours. More as soon as I can get around to it.

:)

17 comments:

Blue Chi said...

Damn, the private jet and pole dance must've been amazing. YOU SHOULD HAVE TAKEN PHOTOGRAPHS!

L_Oman said...

hold up...you are the same chick that drives to wadi kabir in search for used parts and then you get to fly in private JETS?

Your life amazes me. Can I be your friend? And, promise - I don't holy roll on anyone! :)

I hope your time management gets under control 'cause I really like your blog.

Per Your Request said...

Private Jet! Must be nice.
I agree with I_Oman, we really like your blog.

Undercover Dragon said...

Yep Sub' Improve those time management skills. What I like about your blog is that you just couldn't make it up...

And I want a private jet too...

sythe said...

If I get a private airport bus, I wonder if we could hold an improptu stipper contest.... at 120KM/H on the highway to the airport ;)

As everyone else said already, love the blog, it makes me smile. Especially after I've had a shitty phone call with a client :)

Sorry to hear about the Jeep's A/C, but thats what you get when you dont buy a quality 4x4 vehicle like a Land Rover ;)

I'm sure you know better than me how to fix it!

What happened to your blog about the hookers? I was all so excited to hear a womans take on the situation and then nothing. Methinks you chickened out..... ;)

muscati said...

I wonder how much it actually costs to fly a private jet to Dubai and back. Wouldn't you rather you had that amount for shopping money?

Then again, you wouldn't have a story about a private jet to tell :)

Sythe - sorry to burst your bubble, but all British cars are shite, even the American owned ones like Land Rover.

sythe said...

muscati - it's a bit of an on-going thing with suburban about the Land Rover ;)

TVR's arent that bad though.... Neither are Rolls Royce or Bently, or Jaguar for that matter - but I guess no british car manufacturers are left, Daimler AG owns everything these days.

Undercover Dragon said...

Even Rolls Royce is basically made in Germany these days Sythe!

Suburban said...

Blu- It was freaking awesome. We took pictures, but in the interest of privacy I won't be posting them anytime soon. They were hilarious. Sorry.

L_oman- You can totally be my friend then. Thanks sweetie.

PYR, Dragon, Thanks guys. You are Awesome.

Sythe,
Would that not be the most awesome mobile party ever? I am in. The post on the Hookers is still in the works, I just don't have the time / Energy to stay out all night drinking in houses of Ill repute anymore. This weekend, I will post what I've found out so far.

Muscati,

The Jet belongs to my (3rd)cousin's husband. That side of the family are all diplomats or in big, Big business. Anyway, It cost them the same to keep the jet on the ground in Muscat as it did to fly up to Dubai. So Off we went. I can finally cross that one off my Life to-do-list.

Stone has a forest investment which more than offsets our annual carbon emissions plus the trip FYI.

Muscati and Sythe, British cars are rubbish. (thank you muscati) but you guys forgot the Brilliant Aston Martin!!!!

Presently Owned by Prodrive, the briliant people behind the astonishing redevelopment of the Subaru and the group that reorganized BAR, created the World Rally Championship as we know it, and Founded the Middle East rally championship!

I am pretty sure every Aston Martin is built in Banbury, UK by actual British people.

But except for that, Sorry Sythe, Land Rovers are still at the bottom of my list for cars I would like to drive. Remind me to tell you about 1,500 Kms in a shorty Deisel Defender sometime. It was horrible.

:)

Oman Roses said...

you go girl, i would love to fly on a private jet once!!

Oman Roses said...

you go girl, i would love to fly on a private jet once!!

Oman Roses said...

you go girl, i would love to fly on a private jet once!!

Oman Roses said...

you go girl, i would love to fly on a private jet once!!

Oman Roses said...

sorry for all those posts... it must show you how much i love your blog... :)

oman roses

Oman Roses said...

sorry for all those posts... it must show you how much i love your blog... :)

oman roses

L_Oman said...

awwww man, I was hoping you wouldn't give the scoop on the jet so our imaginations could run wild. Next time you decide to tell another once in a lifetime kinda story, don't tell us the details. Makes reading your blog all the more fun!!!!

Suburban said...

Roses,

thanks so much. Sorry about the short dishdasha incident at your UNI. that can be so disenheartening.