Sunday, April 20, 2008

General update from around here

OK. What to write about today?

Not a lot of comments on the panties post. What a bunch of pure, innocent, moral readers I have! Just kidding, because Sitemeter doesn't lie. I got more than twice the number of hits (mostly from google reader) as usual. So fess up you perverts.

We are having a BBQ at our house on Tursday afternoon for the five families in our neighbourhood that we haven't threatened to arrest or kill recently. It's a pretty mixed bunch of folks, and we are hoping that everybody has a nice time, drinks fresh squeezed Juices and beer, and eats our food.

I am also hoping that we can form a Coalition Of The Sane around here, and gradually convince the other 600 assholes in Al Ghubra to move along to a trailer park elsewhere. Or maybe back to whatever rock they crawled out from under in the first place.

Remember back when I was bitching about the kids in our neighbourhood Joyriding in thier dad's Minibus? A couple of weeks ago, while we were out camping, our own resident adolescent decided to "borrow" my car to practice driving. By borrow, I mean steal. Oh god, the irony.

She proceded to run it into / past a wall, at very low speed, scratching the quarter panel and tearing the bumper off. Once we got her to admit that maybe she had taken the car for a teensy-weensy drive, we had the usual discussion. There were tears, and there was lots of shouting. Because as you guys may or may not be aware, the manditory penalty for driving without a lisence here is 48 hours in Prison. Do you think we made her call the ROP and explain that she wrecked the car while driving without a lisence?

You bet your ass we did. She can report that the Byriani in jail is pretty good, but the hamburgers leave something to be desired.

I'm kidding again. We made her call the ROP and explain everything but I' m a little dissapointed/ releived to report that the ROP decided not throw her in the slammer. The guys who came to file the report were very impressed with her owning up to the mistake and accepting responsibility, even if that meant jail. Also, they thought it was hilarious. I was still so angry that I had flat out refused to apply wasta to get my accident report, so she was a very, very lucky girl.

For Sale: One teenager.
Female adolescent, three highly desirable passports, plus a green card. Fair complexion, good with babies and children. Cannot cook to save her life, but could be persuaded to learn. Does laundry. Any reasonable offer considered.
More tomorrow, when I think I'll highlight where to get your hooker fix in Muscat. Gone are the days of One stop shopping at Feeny's or the Sheraton.

10 comments:

Ali said...

Ah come on cut us some slack, I read all your posts through google reader so the panties story wasn't "sbeshial" or something :p

Its amazing how you handled your teenager's situation, I bet she won't even think of it ever again haha

L_Oman said...

Are you serious? A teenage girl stole your car? Ahhh, the days of lawn jobs.

Are you in ghetto ghubra or what?

Too funny about the trailor park comment tho. Can you imagine such a thing here - double wides. With vaulted ceilings and fireplaces! Oh, and the plastic jacuzi to boot in the 'master suite'. ROFL.

sythe said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
sythe said...

haha!

I didnt comment on the panties thing because I didnt really know what to say about it... I just thought it was funny that Israel are making panties and shipping them to the rest of the ME. :)

With regards to your daughter.. wow.. I doubt she'll do it again in a hurry!

Ghetto Ghubra... its not THAT bad here, is it?

Hope the bbq goes well :P

HijabIsOverrated said...

You want some green chilli's!!??

They way you talk about Chilli's thats the same way i think about ethopian food, in and out burger, good mexican food. I'm sad to say i haven't found a good food joint since moving to ABQ.


Can i freeze dry them and express ship it to you? My husband was offered a job in Saudi so I might be dreaming about green chilli one day myself. I rather we move to Qatar or Oman but ever job site i go one wants us to pay 100.00 or more to post a resume or their job posts.. thats crazy... considering they would more than likely not have a job posted for his career anyway.

santa wayne said...

so i want to know whom to contact in the rop or? to look into an individual who is illegal and a bunch more! uae recently added such a 'program'...surely oman has this already in place?

Suburban said...

Cheers for the comments team.

Ali- your are correct...The teenager will not be stealing the car again. She was so scared, it was hilarious.

L_Oman- I'm pretty sure the literal translation of Al GHubra is The Ghetto. If it's not, it should be.

Hijab- Yes, I will likely die if I don't get some green chile soon. Pity about your husband's CV. WHat is his industry?

Santa- You can march right down to the ROP station and speak to the ranking officer on duty, preferably a Major or higher in ranking.

Before you do though, you should know that the ROP is unlikely to take any complaint seriously if your motives are just to get someone you dislike in trouble. You will instead be inviting unwelcome scrutiny onto yourself.

Good luck.

Anonymous said...

We did the same with our 15 year old son when he took the car round the block for a drive. The police were great, they told us to collect him from school and drop him at the police station in Bausher. We did and he was taken into a room to be given quite a stern, but kind talk as well as a look at pictures of mangled bodies that had been taken out of car wrecks.

Undercover Dragon said...

The ROP are great.

santa wayne said...

well i'm sure rop scrutiny would prevail however, these unabashed approaches are really out of control..knocking on my villa door and even near the hyatt in the candle beach bar....not to mention what has happened to dubai!! we used to go to listen to music and dance some but the best places for good sound are infiltrated. my wife has been really taken aback thinking i really knew these people. well at least Rock Bottom is ok!