The security guys have been rather subdued of late, for reasons I don't understand. I almost never get break dancing demonstrations on my way to work anymore, and nobody has collectively referred to me, my children and mother as "Stone's Bitches" in ages. I was beginning to wonder if they didn't like me anymore.
I needn't have feared, because today they really outdid themselves.
Driving toward the checkpoint this morning, the guys recognized my car and raised the barrier while I was still 100 meters away. Awesome. as I approach the guard house, all of a sudden the door to the guard house flies open and the security guys perform the most amazing series of rolling, jumping, special ops type moves I have ever seen outside of action movies. They looked like the penguins from Madagascar, where they are about to hijack the ship.
I Lock my brakes up, and squeal to a halt, as they reach for their holsters, pull out their weapons, and open fire on me. Thankfully, their weapons were 4 staplers, shooting out little bitty staples which tinkled off the hood of my car as the guards collapsed in a heap of laughing snorting, brown uniform wearing hilarity.
"Suburban! We are ambush you!"
"Suburban! I am James Bond!"
"Hey Suburban! mamma Said Knock you ouuuut!!!"
"Nice one guys, you'll be promoted ISS in no time with skills like that."
I love those guys, they made my day.